Thursday, November 4, 2010

She'll Be 93 in a Month

Scott and I went to his sister Tanya’s for supper on Sunday and I got dropped off at Kelvindell Lodge on the way. Grandma was in the dining room; she looked closely at my face and asked “Where did you come from?” and we went together down to her room. She used a walker, and when we got there she lay down immediately on her bed and proceeded to say absolutely nothing except, in response to my attempts at conversation, “Oh?” or “I don’t know.”

I should probably feel bad saying it, but it was a relief, an hour later, to walk her back to the dining room, settle her into a chair in front of her supper, kiss her and leave. It's not easy to have a chat all by myself. Perhaps a better thing to do would be to stay where the other residents are hanging out, and talk with those who are more into it. Grandma is happy just to listen.


  1. Yes definitely I have found that it helps to stay where other people are. M&D are both much more talkative if there are other people about. My Dad is coming up to 92 in January. Mom is just a spring chicken .... 89

  2. Oh dear, it's very heavy on one's heart to see a beloved one becoming frail and aged. Your grandma is a lovely old age. Many of my personal older people have lived very long lives. It's hard to keep the conversation going and as my 98 year old aunt used to say, "I forget the words so I don't want to talk much"

    Best to You
    Saskbirder Kathy in Estevan

  3. I can remember having a similar feeling about my grandmother---she was another person; she didn't know us and really, except for her familiar and graceful body, we didn't know her anymore either. I have often felt guilty about that,but at the same time, I would prefer my family not to feel obliged to see me when it would be so empty an experience if I were to fall prey to Altzheimer's.

  4. perhaps read to her? since she likes listening.

  5. I visit with my Dad everyday and totally understand that feeling of relief.


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