Sunday, June 10, 2012

Foot Draggin'

Just beyond my front window

Emil doesn't want to go back to the group home when it's time on Sunday evenings.

"Get ready," I say at 7 o'clock, and he replies "But I don't want to go till my watch says 8 o'clock."

So I say, "That means I'll be getting home later than I'd like, so go get ready now!"

He says okay, but then spends a half-hour in the bathroom. Don't ask me what he's doing in there that takes forever. He drags his feet at every opportunity; I want to kick his buttocks. Instead I remind myself that this is an opportunity to read for a few minutes while waiting, or in this case write.

Relax, Kathy.  Go with the flow. You cannot really hurry this boy, try as you might. All it does is make you cranky when you fail to get what you're after. You're better off to take a deep breath and let him be. And you'll get out to the vehicle, and you'll get him dropped off in town, and you'll get home ... eventually. And you'll live.


  1. I get some of my best reading done when Dave tells me he'll be ready in 20 minutes. But, I spent years of my life muttering to myself about how my time was as valuable as his before I took a deep breath and started to rely on my books to get me through. Sometimes, though, my makeup starts to fade before we get out of the house.

  2. LOL Lorna. Usually here, it's Scott standing at the door, waiting while I have that last-minute pee!

    I got home last night after my drive (took longer because I found our old dog out gallavanting and made her walk the mile home beside my van) and Scott said, rolling his eyes, that Emil had already phoned "just wanting to talk to you."

    I worry; what will he do when I die? Already I try to prepare him by talking about the eventual reality of it, quite matter of factly. "Someday I won't be here and you'll have to be okay."

  3. Waiting on people is annoying, and oh so hard to let it go. Patience ommmmmmm!

  4. Waiting on Emil has been going on for the past 23 years, due to his cerebral palsy slowing him down some. However, a friend once told me that when I feel impatient with him it's because I'm more concerned with my own desires than his needs. As the parent of a young child, at that point, those words hit home, hard. What mother wants to hear that she is being selfish instead of generous with her beloved child? It was an eye-opener though and I find it very true.


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