Panic Attacks

Another weekend has come and gone. Man, the time goes fast, doesn't it? I guess tidying and cleaning up the house and getting on top of the dishes are just So Much Fun that time flies! At any rate I like having a couple days at home to put things back in order without rushing.

That's really all I had the energy for. I'm still coughing and even had the beginnings of a panic attack one afternoon when my chest felt heavy and constricted so that I couldn't breathe deeply or quite normally. In the moment, I did recognize it was "only" a panic attack (there was a time when I had quite a few during a short period, many years ago) and that there is only one way to cope with them and that is to "breathe through it." But at the same time, I was thinking, "Maybe this is the beginning of a heart attack. I am not ready to die. My affairs are not in order!" That's why they're called panic attacks, I guess; because you are afraid you might actually be dying.

They are scary, even when you know better.